SACRAMENTO, California — Sure, there’s the presidency and all… but Californians are looking forward to seeing the effects of controversial Measure FN enacted.  Dubbed the Fruits and Nuts measure, it will legalize such cultural norms as the ‘California stop,’ the two-car left turn on a red, driving while applying makeup, driving while under the influence of medical marijuana, and naked driving. The measure would essentially abolish all traffic laws.

"I am proud to have endorsed Measure FN," said the Governor Schwarzenegger, "because Californians have been doing all this stuff, these time-honored traditions, for way too long anyway.  And for a state with 35 million people, we simply need to keep the traffic moving — like bowels — as consistently and speedily as possible and not waste time worrying about what people are doing."

The LaLa Times editorial board also resoundingly supported the successful measure: "Remember all those people who said this might lead to insane speeds on our roadways?" said Publisher Dagmar O'Scheissenberg. "Well, they were wrong — it definitely will.  And we applaud that kind of wackiness.  So go out on those great roadways and keep California unpredictable!"

Conscientious celeb drivers Lindsay Lohan, George Michael and Nicole Ritchie led voters to overwhelmingly endorse Measure FN.

"Celebrities are picked on a lot for traffic stuff," Lohan reportedly said, "so we really appreciate that all you voter people helped us out.  Laypeople, friends, countrymen — lend me your vehicles!"

"Yeah," added Ritchie at a post-vote photo op for the unusual ballot measure, "road rules are way overrated.  I mean, who came up with all this stupid laws anyways?!"

Opponents, however, argue that easing road regulations would only encourage reckless behavior, but proponents quickly counter that most drivers are already acting recklessly, regardless of whether it's legal or not. 

Police Chief William J. Bratton simply responded, "Are all you people nuts!?"